I can't take much more of this!
Waiting, waiting, waiting. It's consuming me, and every spare thought I have is about babies. I can't take it much longer! Am I pregnant? I want to know, damnit! I NEED to know!
Sadly, I have to wait until Friday. I can only do the test so early, after all. I'm probably going to try to wait until Saturday morning, but I'm not quite sure I'll make it. I'll do my best, though - maybe it will help.
I still have this odd feeling that I might be. Mostly it's due to a few signs that I'm having (you probably don't want to know, and it's not all that important anyway). I can't say I'm certain, really - I'm not certain about any of it. (It's all such an uncertain business). But I think I am. I *hope* I am.
Saturday. Four days. Well...3 1/2. I can't wait!
But, at the same time, I'm sort of dreading it. What if it's negative? I'll have spent the past few weeks fooling myself. I don't like the idea of that at all. And I'll be...
I'll have to steal Veronica's (a friend in Wales) description of this. Even though she and her husband aren't trying, she recently found out she's not pregnant and she's crushed. And that's what I'll be. Crushed. I'm sure that in the end I'll convince myself that it would be better if it happened next month, or the month after that, or the month after that. But that might take a while, and in the meantime I'll be incredibly upset. And I know my husband will be very disappointed.
This is Veronica's first appearance in this blog. I met her through work a few years ago, and she has since met/married her husband (Ben) and moved to Wales. I miss her a great deal, but luckily we keep in touch through email. That's better than nothing, I guess. I had no idea she even wanted a child - she always told me that she never wanted children. But I said the same, once, and look at me now. Just goes to show how much things can change in such a short time.
I guess that's about all I have to say. My husband will be home soon, and I don't want him to see me stressing so much about this.
More later - maybe Saturday when I know for sure (or sooner if I can't hold out).
Added as an afterthought:
I wished a "friend" (and that term is used quite loosely) happy birthday today. I got a short, one-line email back from him (which is the most I've heard for months), and that was about it. We have a history - a long, somewhat-trying friendship - and I hate being blown off this way. What a prick.
Sadly, I have to wait until Friday. I can only do the test so early, after all. I'm probably going to try to wait until Saturday morning, but I'm not quite sure I'll make it. I'll do my best, though - maybe it will help.
I still have this odd feeling that I might be. Mostly it's due to a few signs that I'm having (you probably don't want to know, and it's not all that important anyway). I can't say I'm certain, really - I'm not certain about any of it. (It's all such an uncertain business). But I think I am. I *hope* I am.
Saturday. Four days. Well...3 1/2. I can't wait!
But, at the same time, I'm sort of dreading it. What if it's negative? I'll have spent the past few weeks fooling myself. I don't like the idea of that at all. And I'll be...
I'll have to steal Veronica's (a friend in Wales) description of this. Even though she and her husband aren't trying, she recently found out she's not pregnant and she's crushed. And that's what I'll be. Crushed. I'm sure that in the end I'll convince myself that it would be better if it happened next month, or the month after that, or the month after that. But that might take a while, and in the meantime I'll be incredibly upset. And I know my husband will be very disappointed.
This is Veronica's first appearance in this blog. I met her through work a few years ago, and she has since met/married her husband (Ben) and moved to Wales. I miss her a great deal, but luckily we keep in touch through email. That's better than nothing, I guess. I had no idea she even wanted a child - she always told me that she never wanted children. But I said the same, once, and look at me now. Just goes to show how much things can change in such a short time.
I guess that's about all I have to say. My husband will be home soon, and I don't want him to see me stressing so much about this.
More later - maybe Saturday when I know for sure (or sooner if I can't hold out).
Added as an afterthought:
I wished a "friend" (and that term is used quite loosely) happy birthday today. I got a short, one-line email back from him (which is the most I've heard for months), and that was about it. We have a history - a long, somewhat-trying friendship - and I hate being blown off this way. What a prick.
posted by Unknown at 3:48 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home