*Grits teeth*

All I have to say is that I hate - repeat, HATE - when someone 1) screws up something that belongs to you and 2) doesn't give a shit.

One of the guys that comes over every Saturday lost something of mine, and without even helping me look for it he just left. Have I found it yet? No. Will I? Probably not. If I haven't found it yet, it's probably gone (my house has a habit of eating small things). So not only did this asshole screw this thing up, but he didn't give a shit. And this after we've brought him into our home every Saturday for MONTHS.

And that pisses me off. The lack of respect is STAGGERING! Nevermind the fact that what he lost I can't just go out and replace.

If he had any money, at all, I'd charge his bitch ass for it.

Dickhead.

*Fume*

Truth in advertising.

I think the picture speaks for itself, really. (Found on http://www.engrish.com/)

News posted very late.

I guess it's pretty obvious by now. No baby. At least, not this month. *Sigh* I've come to terms with it now, but for a little while I was really bummed. (I even cried!) I'm trying to look at it this way - we have another month of fun trying ahead of us. But I would've loved if it would've happened.

Not a whole lot else to say currently. I think there was something else, but I've since forgotten what it was. If/when it comes back to me, I'll come back and do an edit. Until then, I'll just leave it at this.

Oh...and Thom needs to get back here and post some more! I'm at his house currently, so will give him a prod or two to get him moving. :D

More later.

I can't take much more of this!

Waiting, waiting, waiting. It's consuming me, and every spare thought I have is about babies. I can't take it much longer! Am I pregnant? I want to know, damnit! I NEED to know!

Sadly, I have to wait until Friday. I can only do the test so early, after all. I'm probably going to try to wait until Saturday morning, but I'm not quite sure I'll make it. I'll do my best, though - maybe it will help.

I still have this odd feeling that I might be. Mostly it's due to a few signs that I'm having (you probably don't want to know, and it's not all that important anyway). I can't say I'm certain, really - I'm not certain about any of it. (It's all such an uncertain business). But I think I am. I *hope* I am.

Saturday. Four days. Well...3 1/2. I can't wait!

But, at the same time, I'm sort of dreading it. What if it's negative? I'll have spent the past few weeks fooling myself. I don't like the idea of that at all. And I'll be...

I'll have to steal Veronica's (a friend in Wales) description of this. Even though she and her husband aren't trying, she recently found out she's not pregnant and she's crushed. And that's what I'll be. Crushed. I'm sure that in the end I'll convince myself that it would be better if it happened next month, or the month after that, or the month after that. But that might take a while, and in the meantime I'll be incredibly upset. And I know my husband will be very disappointed.

This is Veronica's first appearance in this blog. I met her through work a few years ago, and she has since met/married her husband (Ben) and moved to Wales. I miss her a great deal, but luckily we keep in touch through email. That's better than nothing, I guess. I had no idea she even wanted a child - she always told me that she never wanted children. But I said the same, once, and look at me now. Just goes to show how much things can change in such a short time.

I guess that's about all I have to say. My husband will be home soon, and I don't want him to see me stressing so much about this.

More later - maybe Saturday when I know for sure (or sooner if I can't hold out).

Added as an afterthought:

I wished a "friend" (and that term is used quite loosely) happy birthday today. I got a short, one-line email back from him (which is the most I've heard for months), and that was about it. We have a history - a long, somewhat-trying friendship - and I hate being blown off this way. What a prick.